South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
