i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
