I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
It was confusing and full of hummus
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
