If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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