wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Banned from zoo.
Again?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
