can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Randomize