I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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