i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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