Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
