She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
It's blow job season.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
