and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
