The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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