I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
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