There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
