woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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