i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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