Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
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