How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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