I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Randomize
