I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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