everyone is single if you try hard enough
they need to just BURY HIM!
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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