honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
