why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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