fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
