It's Friday. Sex?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize