how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
