Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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