just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
