I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
