So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
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