why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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