First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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