worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
