Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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