: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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