Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
