it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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