Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
