Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
