Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize