you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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