Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I love you. Go after that dick
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
