oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
