Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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