Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
