real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
