Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
it's great music for shaving your balls
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize