I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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