When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize