South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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