I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
